Monday, May 25, 2015

Music Monday's Relationship Issues ("don't you love farce?")

Y'all know about iffy relationship issues, one way or another I'm sure. Many common ones have been put to words and music. For instance:

I still miss Jake Thackray and his fun songs, after all these years (he died much too soon in 2002). Here he is with a bit of La-di-dah on the in-law issue:

Sample lyrics:
....I'll be nice to your mother,
I'll come all over lah-di-dah,
Although she always gets up me nose.
(I love you very much.)
And so I'll smile and I'll acquiesce
When she invites me to caress
Her scabby cat;
I'll sit still while she knits
And witters, cross my heart,
And I shan't lay a finger on the crabby old batface.

I'll be polite to your daddy,
Frightfully lah-di-dah,
Although he always bores me to my boots.
(I love you very much.)
And so I won't boo and hiss
When he starts to reminisce

Then there's the general feeling of disappointment issue:

Sample lyrics:
Flowers and wine
is what I thought I would find,
when I came home from working tonight.
Well, now here I stand
over this fryin' pan,
and you want a cold one again.

I bought these new heels,
did my nails, had my hair done just right.
I thought this new dress was a sure bet
for romance tonight.
Well it's perfectly clear,
between the TV and beer,
I won't get so much as a kiss.
As I head for the door,
I turn around to be sure,
did I shave my legs for this?

And much the same issue from the male viewpoint:

He's been working all week he's got mental fatigue and that old couch sure looks fine
All week he's been gone she's been sitting alone slowly going out of her mind
As he kicks off his shoes for the six o’clock news she's getting all prettied up
Oh she's wanting to boogie he's wanting to lay there she's got the Friday night blues

And the Friday night blues they get in your shoes and they work to get you down
Oh and there ain't a lady that I ever knew who didn't need her a night on the town
But the hills and the bills and a week's worth of deals has got him feeling more than used
Oh, he's kicking his shoes off she's putting hers on she's got the Friday night blues

Then, as mentioned in the post's title, there's the timing issue:

Just when I'd stopped opening doors
Finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours
Making my entrance again with my usual flair
Sure of my lines, no one is there.
Don't you love farce? My fault, I fear
I thought that you'd want what I want, sorry, my dear.
But where are the clowns, send in the clowns
Don't bother, they're here.

Isn't it rich? Isn't it queer?
Losing my timing this late in my career
But where are the clowns? There ought to be clowns
Well, maybe next year.

  She wears it well  - 1995 above, 2010 below.

Any more iffy relationship songs to add?


mike said...

Any lyrics by Weird Al Yankovic will suffice. The song, "Does Your Chewing Gum Lose It's Flavor (On the Bedpost Overnight?)" is not only weird, but attained a high level of international popularity. It refuses to die and has been a staple of the "Dr. Demento" radio show! Dr. Demento is the king of novelty songs.

Wiki information:

Twilight said...

mike ~ Hmmm - I'm straining to find the relationship issue in the song though. Well...I guess there was a relationship issue with the mother "if your mother says don't chew it do you swallow it in fright?"

mike (again) said...

There's a touch of relationship in the song:
"... Here comes a blushing bride
The groom is by her side
Up to the altar,
Just as steady as Gibraltar
The groom has got the ring
And it's such a pretty thing
But as he slips it on her finger
The choir begins to sing:
Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?

... On the bedpost overnight
Hello there,
I love you and
The one who holds you tight!
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday,
Thursday, Friday, Sat'day night
On the bedpost overnight..."

Well, let's try this one from the UK on ya:

"Don't Marry Her" by The Beautiful South:
"Beautiful South – Don't Marry Her Lyrics
Think of you with pipe and slippers
Think of her in bed
Laying there just watching telly
Then think of me instead

I'll never grow so old and flabby
That could never be
Don't marry her, fuck me

And your love light shines like cardboard
But your work shoes are glistening
She's a PhD in "I told you so"
You've a knighthood in "I'm not listening"

She'll grab your sweaty bollocks
Then slowly raise her knee
Don't marry her, fuck me

When the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco Bay
And you know that you can't have it anyway
You gotta wash the car
Take the kiddies to the park
Don't marry her, fuck me

Those lovely Sunday mornings
With breakfast brought in bed
Those blackbirds look like knitting needles
Trying to peck your head

Those birds will peck your soul out
And throw away the key
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the kitchen's always tidy
And the bathroom's always clean
She's a diploma in "just hiding things"
You've a first in "low esteem"

When your socks smell of angels
But your life smells of Brie
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay
And you realize you can't make it anyway
You have to wash the car
Take the kiddies to the park
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay
And you realize you can't make it anyway
You have to wash the car
Take the kiddies to the park
Don't marry her, fuck me"

Twilight said...

mike (again) ~ Oh! I hadn't checked through to the! OK - that works.

The Beautiful South ...I'd forgotten them - don't think I ever heard the "explicit" version on BBC radio though - "Auntie Beeb" used to take good care of us and censor any naughty words.

Let's see - here's one - "You win again" sung by the wonderful Ray Charles referring to....
The Cheating Issue:

The news is out - all over town
That you've been seen - a-runnin' 'round
I know that I - should leave, but then
I just can't go - you win again.

anyjazz said...

Well, here's mine:

I'm not going to tell you the name because you'll think it's going to be Neil Young.

"Why can't you hasten
when you see that time's a wastin'"

Anonymous said...

And thou is but a little ...

I better get inside.

Quick ... close the door!

Yeah, yeah I know ... my mother told me so.

It's because of things that happened a long time ago ...


Twilight said...

anyjazz ~ Ah yes - The Time-keeping Issue! I'm glad you didn't state the song title - in the world of 2015 it could be taken to refer to something quite different (though still a relationship issue of sorts) ;-)

Twilight said...

Anonymous/kidd ~ Oh yes, #1 The Spying on Her Issue. These days could also have been Edward Snowden's theme tune. :-)

#2 - The PursuingIssue

#3 - Harsh Assessment Issue!

#4 - I'd not hear this before - it's quite lovely too - thanks for the intro. The relationship is not a male/female on this time, but one between a man and his lord/king/leader.
A man should suffer greatly for his lord,
Endure both biting cold and sweltering heat
And sacrifice for him both flesh and blood.

Let's see then I'll take Song of roland and raise you - another with links to knights and such...
The Gallantry Issue:

If Ever I would Leave You from "Camelot"

Anonymous said...

Now you listen to me, I'm an advertising man ... not a red herring.
I've got a job, a secretary, a mother, two ex-wives and several bartenders that depend upon me ...
... and I don't intend to disappoint them all by getting myself "slightly" killed.

... I'll call your Camelot ...


Twilight said...

Anonymous/kidd ~ LOL! Well...she doesn't know how to love him...
so I suppose The Learning Issue raised its head:

Bob said...

Gogi Grant "The Wayward Wind" 1956
Patti Page - The Tennessee Waltz & Changing Partners

Guy Mitchell - Singing the blues (1956).mpg

Gogi (80 years old)

Twilight said...

Bob ~ Nice collection here, covering, erm....
The Flirtin' While Dancin' Issue
The Wandrin' Guy Issue
The Feeling Blue Issue
(And Ms Grant - another lady wearing it well!)